


Fingers Clink Like The Shrapnel You Forgot In Your Pocket

by ineffablesheep



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Bucky Barnes Deserves Better, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, I'm salty and burnt out, M/M, Multi, Not A Fix-It, Not Beta Read, Not Canon Compliant, Not Steve Friendly, Peggy deserved better, Pepper Potts Is a Good Bro, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Tony Stark Lives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:28:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28384782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ineffablesheep/pseuds/ineffablesheep
Summary: Banner counted the seconds as he and Wilson waited for Steve to return. James kept his hands in his pockets and let the numbness spread. He wanted to tell them, to open his mouth but the cold running through him kept him silent. Steve was going to come back, he wanted to say, he’ll come back to you. To his surprise, he found himself waiting, half-holding his breath just in case to see if new memories surfaced or for his arm to be flesh.  Because Steve was a good man, just maybe…---------That good bye scene in A:E between Steve and Bucky, Bucky knowing Steve isn’t coming back, ignoring Steve on the bench. Basically pepperony looking after/absorbing Bucky into their relationship/friendship because after all Steve did to get him back he still fucked off to the past like he decided Bucky wasn't good enough after all and to ruin Peggy’s life in the process. Both of them deserved better. Yes I am salty.
Relationships: (ambigous/implied or platonic its your choice), (one sided), James "Bucky" Barnes & Tony Stark, James "Bucky" Barnes/Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Peggy Carter/Steve Rogers
Comments: 7
Kudos: 105





	Fingers Clink Like The Shrapnel You Forgot In Your Pocket

**Author's Note:**

> I've been sitting on this for a while tbh but I don't think I'm ever going to finish it more than it is. Marvel has managed to achieve what even my mental health couldn't and killed so much of my love for these movies and characters. That being said, I would rather post this half finished and let you lovelies get some enjoyment out of it than keep it hoarded away. I've got a few more bits and pieces I'll tidy up and post in the next week with more info

“You know, if you want, I can come with you.” Wilson offered Steve. He knew he shouldn’t eavesdrop but he couldn’t help it. This was his last real chance and with how good his ears were it was hard not to. Didn’t mean he was going to intrude where he wasn’t wanted though so he kept off to the side, hands in his pockets so he wouldn’t fidget.

“You're a good man, Sam. This one's on me, though.” His friend returned.

That settled, Steve made his way over to him, and gave him a grin. “Don’t do anything stupid until I get back.”

Something in him stuttered to a halt.

“How can I? You’re taking all the stupid with you.” The words come out like rote and despite his best efforts betray how heavy his heart is. He wasn’t sure if the old lines were supposed to comfort or reassure him. They didn’t, not with the way Steve stood there so confident and self-assured. He leaned in for a hug and thank Thor or any other gods out there that Steve hugged him back because he was going to fall apart at the seams if he didn’t get this last hug.

Then Steve let go and the numbness caught his lungs and heart and squeezed. He knew that look in his friend’s eyes – this was going to happen and he couldn’t stop it.

With one last farewell Steve headed back to the time travel machine thing and got ready to leave. James stood and tried to free his heart from the stranglehold on it and tugged his jacket on tighter as though that would bring feeling back to his body. He wanted to leave too, to walk back inside the house where he could be spending time with Pepper and Tony but he stayed. Bucky Barnes would have stayed. Besides, he didn’t think he could force his body into action right now if he tried.

Steve didn’t even look back.

Banner counted the seconds as he and Wilson waited for Steve to return. James kept his hands in his pockets and let the numbness spread. He wanted to tell them, to open his mouth but the cold running through him kept him silent. Steve was going to come back, he wanted to say, he’ll come back to you. To his surprise, he found himself waiting, half-holding his breath just in case to see if new memories surfaced or for his arm to be flesh. Because Steve was a good man, just maybe…

Steve missed his countdown. As Wilson and Banner panicked, he turned away. His fingers clicked against each other as the delicate gears whirred. He hadn’t been worth anything after all. Even if Steve had decided to stay, he could’ve at least freed Bucky? He’d tried so hard to be good, be enough.

No, Steve wouldn’t have stayed in the past after telling the others he’d be back. So where would he be? His Stevie was always a dramatic little shit, he wouldn’t just walk up to the house. He had an eye for landscapes so he’d find a spot somewhere…

“Sam.” He forced it out around the lump in his throat and Wilson hurried over. James didn’t bother pointing, the figure on the bench beneath the tree was obvious even without James’ vision. “Go ahead.” Sam hurried up the hill towards the waiting man while Banner shut down the time machine. He’s glad they’re busy, it means they wouldn’t notice him disappearing.

All the air rushed out of him at the sight of Tony on the porch. The engineer was in a rough state even with the available technology but they’d managed to save him. His right arm was still tightly held against his chest in a sling and he’d never regain full use but there was hope. He was tired, and looked pretty gaunt and haggard, but he was alive and here.

He was there when James reached the porch and he was there to gently steer him inside, away from Wilson’s confused calls and the rasp of Rogers’ tired voice. With her usual grace, Pepper appeared in the doorway behind her husband.

“Come on James, you missed lunch.” She told him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

Tony patted him on the back before making his way inside.

“Come on Jim-Jam, egg salad sandwiches, right?” He’s already deep in the house, still uncomfortable with affection but despite not knowing James’ birthday he knows one of his favourite foods and that’s more than some.

James ignored Wilson and Rogers’ calls.

At the end of the day, Steve was happy.

\---------

Spinning around their lounge, Peggy smiled up at her husband. Four years since they were married, and she was always surprised by him. She always seemed to expect him to be a couple of inches shorter and leaner. It was ridiculous, she was being ridiculous. Steve had never had dark hair. She loved her husband and how he would indulge her with a dance or five any night. Steve knew all her favourite foods and the things she hated about work, would open the door with a smile and a kiss and everything would be alright.

Peggy danced with her husband and wondered why he felt so wrong.

**Author's Note:**

> Had the following combination of the following ideas, never quite worked out where to go with it:
> 
> \- That good bye scene in A:E between Steve and Bucky, Bucky knowing Steve isn’t coming back, ignoring Steve on the bench, Pepper/Tony(how idc)/Bucky with Morgan of course. Basically pepperony looking after/absorbing Bucky into their relationship/friendship because after all Steve did to get him back he still fucked off to the past and to ruin Peggy’s life in the process. Both deserved better. Yes, I am salty.  
> \- "Bucky was just starting to believe he deserves to feel good things in Wakanda and then after Steve left, after the silent words unspoken between them, the “you’re not so worth it after all.” It all goes down the drain. All he feels is the hurt and he knows he deserves it" (saw this floating on insta but lost the source)  
> \- Stony used to be a thing and Bucky was looking forward to getting back with Steve, but in the process of sorting his brain out he gets very close with Tony and Pepper. He wants to commit to them but Steve is his heart and so they are patient and let him know that no matter what – partners or friends – they will love him and be in his life. But Steve isn’t committing even though James is trying and then he fucks off back to Peggy and James realises he wasn’t enough for Steve, wasn’t good enough for Steve and turns to the people who love him regardless of his memories and nightmares and his uncertainty about himself and have no expectations of him.
> 
> If you like this idea, please feel free to consider it a prompt, I just ask you link it to me so I can have a read of your creation :)
> 
> Now, it's some ungodly hour of the morning, I'm still getting over a cold and should probably sleep oops. Love you all,  
> Sheep x


End file.
